Conversations I've had

SM: Will you lick me?
Me: *licks shoulder*
SM: Thanks I was feeling unbalanced.

G: *gesturing towards a public sex act* I so love my life.
Me: I'm actually enjoying the watch it through the cage bars the most.
G: It does add a touch of prison porn movie, doesn't it?
G: I have a lot of porn at home.
Me: *blink*
G: I don't actually watch it...just collect it. Download, burn, put in the closet.
Me: Most people usually keep clothes in their closets.

T: So, ya know the movie where the one girl tries to take over the other's life by copying her?
Me: yes?
T: Would you think it was creepy stalker of me to get your exact hair cut?
T: I wouldn't do the color right away though.

B: There's a puppy, a pony, a kitty, and a fish in the bed.
H: She's a kittyfish.

character 1: Everything's gone but the rum.
character 2: The rum's gone.

B: Oh, they have icecream
Me: I want icecream.
together: Can we have icecream?

W: Okay Your turn to jump.
Me: Na, why don't you go first?
W: Can't I forgot my water shoes.
Me: me too

C: Have you heard anything about these chips?
Me: Umm...no
C: Taste one. Tell me what flavor you think it is.
Me: huh?
C: Doritos taste test ...guess the new flavor
Me: Why does the look on your face scare me?

Me: Oh look the Simpson's ad is 3-D. Or maybe 4-D?
H: No 3-D
B: Fishie will.
Me: Fishie will what?
D: Pose with Homer.